Having an antisocial spouse can be very challenging for any relationship. Antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of regard for others and a pattern of disregarding and violating the rights of those around them. Those with this disorder often manipulate or exploit others for personal gain. They tend to have an inflated sense of self-importance as well.
What are some signs that your husband may be antisocial? He may frequently lie, break promises, or act impulsively without concern for consequences. An antisocial husband will likely seem to lack empathy and remorse for hurting others. He may have a history of legal troubles, problems holding down a job, and turbulent personal relationships. Substance abuse issues frequently accompany antisocial personality disorder as well.
Coping with an Antisocial Spouse
Learning to cope with an antisocial husband starts with educating yourself on the disorder. Understanding why he acts the way he does can help you respond in more constructive ways. It’s also vital that you connect with your own support system of trusted friends, family, or professionals. Do not isolate yourself due to shame or embarrassment.
Set clear boundaries and stick to them. Let your husband know which behaviors you will not tolerate. Refuse to enable or cover up for him. Hold him accountable for his actions. Though it will likely anger him, refusing to rescue your spouse from crises he created himself is essential.
Take care of yourself by meeting your own needs separately from your partner. Pursue your own interests and nurture close relationships outside your marriage. Consult a mental health professional to help you establish healthy coping techniques. With professional help, you can gain strength and learn how to best respond to your husband in constructive ways.
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Deciding whether to remain in a marriage with an antisocial husband is a very complex and personal decision. First, ensure that you and any children or vulnerable family members remain safe, physically and emotionally. Consult professionals regarding your options. Weigh your commitment to the relationship versus the toll his behavior takes on you and your loved ones.
If you choose to stay, set firm boundaries and take steps to protect yourself such as keeping finances separate. Consider a trial separation if needed. If you pursue divorce, secure legal counsel to understand your rights and options for asset division, child custody arrangements, and your future safety. Leaning on support systems is vital when making major life changes.
While an antisocial spouse presents unique challenges, many have found ways to cope, improve the relationship, or leave the marriage in healthy ways. You have the right to be treated with respect. Establish your limits and know there are always options available. With help and support, you have the strength to make the best choices for yourself and your loved ones.
What causes someone to be antisocial?
A: Research shows that antisocial personality disorder likely stems from a combination of genetic tendencies and environmental factors such as abuse, trauma, or unstable home life during childhood.
Can an antisocial person change?
While it’s not impossible, personality disorders are very resistant to change. The afflicted person must truly want to change and commit fully to long-term therapy.
Are antisocial people dangerous?
Antisocial individuals are at higher risk for violence, aggression, and criminal behavior, especially when paired with substance abuse issues. Carefully consider your safety when in a relationship with someone who is antisocial.
Can marriage counseling help an antisocial husband?
Marital therapy could potentially help but only if the antisocial spouse is committed to change. However, manipulative behaviors common with this disorder can undermine counseling efforts.
What should I tell friends and family about my antisocial husband?
Share information on a need-to-know basis, focusing on building your support system. However, keep in mind that antisocial people can be very charming to outsiders. Setting healthy boundaries around private marital matters is wise.
My Husband is an Antisocial Count
Having an antisocial spouse presents immense challenges. Through education, establishing firm personal boundaries, seeking support, and prioritizing your own needs, it is possible to cope with this difficult situation. While there are no easy answers, you deserve to have healthy, caring relationships. With the help of professionals and loved ones, have faith in your ability to make the best choices for yourself and your family.
